[Stories and Literature] In An Introvert's Mind

BGM Here!

It's unnecessary for someone to add excessive textures.

The storyline doesn't seem too depressing, though.

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You are now entering Luré's perspective view.

                            It's been a few weeks since school has started. All those homework, projects, deadlines to meet, and...those students who are busy chattering away with the wind. I can hear their gossips about certain people; people that they dislike. I can tell that includes me, but I'm used to those kind of things already since my last sophomore years of high school. With thoughts running through my mind, I can still remember how I created tons of blunders in elementary. I was so careless back then; letting everything pass before me. Now, in my senior high school year, I changed quite a bit. I was no longer the happy-go-lucky and boisterous person; I am that silent and mysterious person as of now. Sometimes I give in just to let the others leave me alone, sometimes I obey just to give myself a time of solitude. While passing by the hallways to find my class, I find many students gazing at me just because I look all mysterious and emo-ish. Can't they just turn their gaze away from me? I find it very irritating. It's like I'm being watched; stalked mysteriously by tons of people; like I'm trapped in a circus, the people waiting for me to create a trick to entertain them.

But it's all just the same thing.
I'm always being watched by the same students everyday.

                            It was not because of my looks or my personality, it was because they thought I was strange. Like I'm some extraterrestrial being or something. I don't know why they call it strange, but I haven't thought of that before. How was I acting strange? Why are they calling me strange? The more I think about it, the more doubts I obtain in my mind. I seem to be feeling slightly insecure in talking to people at the moment, but I guess that's how I act. Always insecure. I don't know why, I always find myself fidgeting in class when I recite an impromptu speech or give out the answer when the teacher calls my name. I don't know why I was acting like this; I keep asking myself the same thing everytime. Though I've punched numerous boys in their dingdongs many times, I still don't understand why I was "strange". It was all so eerie; like I am caged inside a dark room with a moonlit window.

                            Eventually I found my class and sheepishly open the door. The teacher was eyeing me, and so was the whole class. I blinked. My school day starts at this very moment. Yet everything was still the same; the whole class eyeing me and the teacher raising an eyebrow at me. I was peculiarly just glancing at everything while in class, just waiting for the lunch bell to ring. Even though I'm used to some queer incidents in school days, I still don't understand why everyone has the necessity to turn their gaze towards me. I'm not a model; nor a prostitute; nor a famous actress. I'm just ordinary. But I wish I totally was. I could never escape from those queer and odd intentional stares; they're all piercing me; like I was struck by an arrow to the chest. Although some students just looked at me and then looked away afterwards; I couldn't tell if they're about to give me another gaze or not. It all seems so weird, so..strange. I hadn't thought about this would happen everyday of my lifetime.

Everything was blurry; I was unable to fathom everything I have always wondered about.

                            Yet I like being alone; but I don't consider myself as an outcast. I consider myself as a quiet and "secretly" happy little person, appreciating silence and solitude. My close friends think I was absurd; they thought I was acting insane when I suddenly zipped my mouth up. That didn't change anything. We all change at some point; we change to improve, and not to keep changing to reach perfection. Us people have the right to change; the right to make a difference. But I sometimes do not see how I expect things to be. Let's leave it like that; time heals everything.

                            I left school in a rush as soon as the last bell rang. Slowing down as I reach the front porch of my house, I begin to think again. Why were they staring at me? These questions remain unanswered, but I hope that someday they will be answered. Doing my daily routine after I went back from school; I sit on my bed, pondering on all that has happened. I wish I haven't thought about something strange sooner or later. And later, everything slowly fades away as tomorrow begins.

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hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh this is long and derpy

[Credits]

Gaia for Luré's hair
:devxcandycane5456:(?) for the background

And everything else belong to their rightful owners.